Bang up Christmas

It all started out so well. I had to deliver Liz's Christmas present to her, and her mom wanted to give me mine, so after Liz got out of work I went to meet her at her ma's place out in Waltham. I beat her there, and when I arrived Jan and her boyfriend, Carl, were having dinner with Johnny's and the gang's new friend Cheryl. It was a little odd to me that some friend of his that Jan had just met was over for dinner, but not too strange considering the kind of person that Jan is. And Liz absolutely gushes about how much she loves Cheryl. So when I came in I said something along the lines of, "Nice to meet you, I've heard nothing but good things about you." (Nevermind Liz, Johnny was completely smitten with her before he moved out - if she wasn't married, I would have been freaked out). And she says to me - no shit - "Yeah, same here about you". Wait. What? You do actually talk with your friend Johnny, right? I'm so confused! But she really is very sweet, and I can see why everyone likes her so much. She even gave me a hug on her way out the door.
Anyhow, Liz loved loved loved the present that I got her (all the building blocks of a million home cooked meals). And Jan got me this pretty chinese vase with a gold dragon on it, and a dragon book to go along with it. Very sweet of her. And, I think that both of them have started to figure out that, no matter how pissed off they are at Johnny, I'm not anxious to sit around trash talking him with them. I understand their frustration and everything, and it sounds like he's been a real jerk to everyone lately, but I really just want him to be happy because that's the only thing that would make everything I've just been through worth a damn. So, we all hung out for a little while talking about just about everything but you-know-who before I drove Liz out to Devon's place in Medford, where he apparently had a gift for me as well (total surprise! He's such a good 'un).
Well, we had a little "snag" just before we made it across the Somerville-Medford line. I was driving through the intersection behind an SUV that turned on the right blinker and started to turn right, but then I guess they changed their mind about where they were headed because as I'm in the middle of the intersection, they changed direction and drove straight into my passenger side door. My entire passenger window shattered all over Liz, and the door was so crumpled that it can no longer be opened, but fortunately, neither of us was hurt. We'll both be picking glass out of our coats for weeks, but apparently unscathed. Then it sort of turned into a freakshow. The female passenger of the SUV started giving Liz shit, "fuck this" "bitch that" "no uh-uh, this ain't our fuckin' fault you fuckin' bitch", and the two other guys who were in the car had to pull her away. And apparently one of them made a comment about "that's the second time that's happened". Figures. But a cop showed up quickly and played mediator between us. And while he was in his patrol car, the guys were playing peek-a-boo behind their SUV, harassing pedestrians walking by. I'm thinking to myself , um, anyone need a drug test right about now? But the cop finished up with us and sent them on their way and came over to see if we needed anything else. Liz commented on all the glass in her seat, so he offered her a ride in his car up the rest of the hill to Devon's house. Ha! Liz rode in a cop car! And when we got there, he totally offered to help carry all the bags that I had in the trunk up the stairs for us. Nice nice guy. Oh, and he says to me, "Your headlight's out. If anyone stops you, just tell them that it was from the accident". Nice.
So, I headed from there, sans window around the corner to Mike's place for a couple of beers before heading home. And we tried to get the window sealed up with plastic bags, without much success because of the rain. (Oh, yeah. Did I mention that this all happened in the rain? Lovely timing). And now, I'm leaving tomorrow for the better part of a week and have to leave my car sitting on the street with no window because the driver's insurance company doesn't have anyone in the office until Tuesday so I can't even get it appraised until the day after New Years. Suck. Well, Merry Christmas to me. Maybe Johnny was right about me being such a horrible person...karma certainly seems to think so.